yes.
Would I jump in front of a bus for them?
totally.
would I donate my entire body and organs (even though it's old and gelatinous) to them?
no question.
Then, why, may I ask, do I want to smack the crap out of them every time I'm eating something and they ask for a bite!?
All I want is one whole meal. To myself. That's it. Is it too much to ask to pop up that bagel from the toaster and eat it in all of it's buttery glory down to the very last nibble!? I think not! Get your grubby little hands away from my food! This is mine. It has way more carbs than you are supposed to eat in a lifetime! Eat your effin healthy well balanced meal that I slaved over (before I made my own breakfast, mind you)!!
And another thing! Can I just drink my coffee in peace?! It's taken me 4 days to get through this 10 page Bed Bath and Beyond weekly circular because you keep interrupting me!!! 10 minutes! I know you can do it! All I want is 10 effing minutes.
Crap, I just spent it writing this. Well, guess it looks like another "soggy waffle scraps with some backwashed yogurt" morning for me. MMmmm. iHOP should really copy my menu.
1 comments:
That is so funny and SO true! Great post.
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